Spare The Rod Spoil The Child
Why did this saying come into existence? It is from the bible. In Proverbs 13:24 it says “ He who spares the rod hates his son,but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.” Let me make sure nobody misunderstands what this is saying. It is not telling us to beat our children. What it does say is we need to keep a close watch on our children and make sure they are listening to what they are told to do. If they are not we have to in love correct them. Back in the day they would take a switch and wack the children on their behinds. The rod is a symbol of authority and righteousness. As the parent you should know what is right and wrong and quickly and swiftly chastise your child. Consequences for their behaviors are what works. That is exactly what God does to us. We receive consequences when we act out. Most people think God does not discipline us but that is far from what the word of God tells us. A parent who really loves his child will not allow them to just do whatever they want. Selfish parents will not bother when they know the child is wrong. They are too tired from their own day to deal so they allow behaviors to go and on. The child then becomes a demanding brat who can not take no for an answer. Parents, you are the boss not the child. I do not care if they scream their little heads off do not give in to behavior that needs to be corrected. You will create a monster. I have watched children in day care that have been terrible brats. They learned very quickly that they would not be able to do what they did with their parents. I had one child who literally attacked the mom when she would pick him up. He would try to bite her. It was quite disturbing as he attacked and the mom stood there in total embarrassment because she had no clue what to do. The next day the child came I told him I better never see him do that again in my home. I took authority over the bad behavior and when mom showed up the next day he looked at me a never made a move. Mom questioned why he did not go after her and I told her because I told him not to. I have had children go nuts when I tried to change them. I told them only once to knock it off and that I was not in some battle with them. I have to change your diaper so lay still until I am done. They stopped immediately. Why? Because I know my authority as the adult and the child needs to follow my instruction not his or her own. You almost have to put the fear of God in them as the adult. If they do not fear or have respect for the parent why would they listen. It is the same with God. If we do not fear Him why would we listen. We listen for two reasons. We love and want to please the parent or we are afraid of the what will happen if we do not listen. Children need to know that mom and dad are in control of their lives because they know they are not capablee of taking care of them selves yet. That is why teenagers have issues because they begin to feel they know what is best for themselves so the rules should not have to apply. Children have to be taught how to over come rebellion. It is part of being human to want to do things our own way. We do not want anybody to tell us we are wrong or not to do what we want. Unless you really trust the adult you will be rebellious. You and I have to know that our parents loved us and did the best they could. They might have made mistakes but they really tried their best to teach us what was right and wrong. If your parents spoiled you then God has been working on unspoiling you in your adult life. You may be having fits over your life and the unanswered prayers but there is a reason for all of it. Let go and let God be God in your life. We need to stop fighting Him because He is right. He is right all the time too. We as parents are not always right but our children need to know we are the boss not them. Say no to your child once in awhile and see how spoiled they actually are. Do not let them order you around. If you do not want them to wear a certain pair of shoes and they have a fit, too bad. You are the boss and do not feel guilty about it. We are not here to be friends with our children. Not when they are young anyway. As adults we can become close in a different way but until that time children are to be taught how to be decent human beings. They will not be decent people if they get whatever they want when they want. If you give them too many things they love the things more than the parent. Children have to love us just because we are their parents and we love them . They should not only be good to get toys. They should be good because it is the right thing to do. Persuading a child to do what is right by giving them a toy makes them not want to do right unless they are rewarded. There is no reward for doing right accept from your Father God who will bless you each and every day. We all need to love God enough to want to please Him. How much do you love your Father? Are you willing to listen to His instruction? Parents remember you want your children to be accepted in this world as decent people so lets stop feeling sorry for them when they have sinned. Children sin all the time too. It is up to us to show them when they are wrong and not let them slide because w e can not handle their tears. Better they cry now than later when God has to fix the mess we created by not teaching them the right way to act. God bless you!